A Submitted Life is Foundational for Kingdom People to work in Agreement

Paul wrote, “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” 

The subject of mutual submission only makes sense when it is considered in the context of how Jesus wants us to live our lives.  He was very clear that we are called to respond to his love and to love each other unconditionally.   Also, even as I try to communicate what this teaching has meant in my life I am reminded of one of Doug Coe’s statements, “Following Jesus is not an exact science.”  Thus, these thoughts are things that have helped Kay and me on our journey.  They are not the way in which submission is done.

The most important thing I have learned as I have sought to live in obedience to this command is that I am to be a submitted person to Jesus and to other followers of his.  This is transformational in my life as it is a way of experiencing love for God and love for others—which is the basis for all Kingdom work.

Because of the way the word “submit” has been used to control and abuse people in Christian circles it often rings in our ears with a negative tone.  If we can mute that tone we might discover this is an important subject for serious followers of Jesus Christ.

Consider the help that practising submission could be to improve our lives and our care for others.  What if we viewed the process in the way we think about submitting a manuscript to an editor.  We do the very best work we can, withholding nothing, and present it to the editor for correction and insights.  It is done to improve our work, not to diminish it.  In the same way, we submit our best thoughts, our dreams and visions to those we trust so we can more clearly discern the things that are from God. And knowing we are going to submit our ideas to others bring clarity to our thinking even before we submit them.  In this process of submission we not only have a clearer sense of the mind of Christ but we also come to know each other better and to love each other more.  It is empowering!

Other things learned about submission on this journey

• The Trinity models mutual submission for us.  As we begin to understand and experience God we see that God is a living Fellowship who creates through submission.  The more we walk with Jesus the more our hearts are directed towards this kind of love for each other.

• Biblical agreement and biblical submission are inseparable.  In Matthew 18:15-20 Jesus teaches us the importance of keeping our relationships reconciled because we all need a small group with whom we walk in agreement.  The presence of Jesus in each of our small groups helps us come to an agreement with the Lord and with each other so that the things we pray for are the things God wants in our lives and in the lives of those we love and pray for.

·         Then the objective becomes one of walking in agreement in thought and action in the work of the Kingdom.  Humility is basic to this process.  We are commanded to humble ourselves and unless we do this we will never submit our ideas and our lives to others.  Thus we will continue to be doing the work of the kingdom as individualistic, self-centred, unteachable persons.  Out of humble submission agreement comes and agreement empowers with the power of God. Without the humility to submit to others, we can never work in agreement.  We can get the pseudo agreement—which is really capitulation—but  we will never have the agreement Paul advocates.

• Submission as part of the process leading to the agreement is natural, not imposed.  As mentioned earlier the Greek word hupotasso means a sweet reasonableness and a willingness to accept less than what may be due.  It is the opposite of self-assertion, the opposite of an independent, autocratic spirit.  It is not the end-all or a stand-alone concept but is the process that means we are better able to hear from God and from others to move forward with power and discernment. 
• Often this process of submitting ourselves and our ideas will not be perfect because we are not perfect.  But regardless of the outcome, we can trust Jesus who is over-seeing and active in the process.
• Being submitted to God makes submission to others possible.  However, how can we say we are submitted to God who we can’t see if we refuse to be submitted to our sisters and brothers who we can see.  Too often saying we are submitted to God rather than our companions slides into doing whatever we want to do and calling it “God’s will.”

·         The implication of the “one to another” is that submission is to be mutual and that is what allows us to walk together.  In my relationships, some companions submit more things to me than I do to them and often I submit more concerns to others than they do to me but the submission is mutual even if the number of things submitted is not equal. 

·         None of us is able to process all the issues of all our friends so it seems like God connects us with the people we need to move forward in agreement in each part of our lives.  I don’t want to be an unsubmitted and lacking agreement in any of the places where I believe God has me caring for others.  In each of my involvements: Africa, Church, Fellows, Young Life, etc. I have, and need, at least one person to whom I am submitted as we discern how to move forward in that area.  The submission that brings real benefit has always been with a very few on any issue.  A larger group can affirm what the few have discerned, but rarely is a large group a place of mutual submission.  However, when we submit to the few it helps us become willing to hear other thoughts from the larger community.

·         Building trust in the relationships makes submission possible.  We should not submit to those who haven’t earned our trust as we have walked together.  And more than likely, if we do not share a common vision we will not have insights that are helpful to each other.

·         We also know that many people do not want the responsibility of others submitting their lives and issues to them so this “smallenizes” the pool of people available to us for this deep walking together.

·         As I learn to hear God through people I know well and have come to trust I am also learning that people who I know only casually may also be able to speak truth into my life and my discernment.

·         Jesus is the protection of our submitted relationships.  We are submitting to Jesus through people and this can be a messy process.  Because we are not perfect, invariably we will come to some agreements that are not helpful.  But because our goal is to know what God wants, his grace shows up and redeems even our mistaken discernments.

·         Hebrews 13:17 reads in part, “Have confidence in your leaders and submit to their authority, because they keep watch over you as those who must give an account.” There is a place for submitting to the ones God has given the responsibility for shepherding us.

·         Another time submission to a leader naturally happens is a result of discerning together.  When companions who are equal discern together what should be done they also often discern who has the gifts and calling to lead a venture.  When this is discerned the others all submit to this leader in the activity.

·         Paul and Barnabas give us a clear picture of how to do this right.  In Acts 13, they, and three other elders in Antioch were together centring their lives on Jesus when the Spirit told them to separate Barnabas and Paul for a mission.  The group fasted and prayed and submitted this idea to the Lord and to each other.   When they concluded this was the right decision they laid hands on Barnabas and Paul and sent them off.   The next phrase is, “The two of them, sent on their way by the Holy Spirit. . .”  so for the next three years Barnabas and Paul were empowered by both this submitted agreement with their companions and by the Spirit within them.

·         Then they showed us how to do it wrong.  When talking about the next mission, as recorded in Acts 15, pride kept them from submitting to each other over the issue of taking John Mark with them.  Thus two of the closest companions in the New Testament walked away from their partnership and went separate ways because they would not submit to each other.

There are still some questions that are not easy to answer

·         The only one who has the right to direct my life or to veto my ideas is Jesus, but when we submit to Jesus in others does this give them veto power over our decisions.  If so, when we give them this power have we quit being responsible for our lives? 

·         Does this process have to be understood in ways that we can verbalize it or does our love for each other have us naturally living in submission and agreement with each other?

·         How does mutual submission work in an organization that has specific lines of authority?  What does a boss submitting to an employee look like?

By Kent Hotaling

What Is The Difference Between Management And Leadership? Terina Allen

I loved this article and would like to just lift is as is for this week’s blog. I need not say anything about it. Here is the link to the article https://www.forbes.com/sites/terinaallen/2018/10/09/what-is-the-difference-between-management-and-leadership/#6443bfcd74d6

The article made me do it.

I didn't plan to write this article. I didn't want to write yet another thing about the definition, value and distinctions of management and leadership. I thought we were passed this (by “we” I refer to the collective group of executives, managers, consultants and leaders out here). But after reading yet another article this morning that kept encouraging managers and directors to “better manage” their people, I realized that we are not. This was an article published by a highly reputable institution advising managers to manage other people. They got it so wrong.

If you currently are or have ever been one of my colleagues, clients, students or in any of my leadership workshops, you have surely already heard this. I ask you to bear with me. One of the articles I read this morning made me do it.

The mindset caused me to cringe inside.

I cringed inside because the more I read, the more I realized that this was not just semantics and a difference on word choice. No. It was an outright mindset that really pushed forward the theory that we – people – could ever actually manage other people and do it effectively.

That mindset is a problem for me since most people cannot even effectively manage themselves, their own lives, their families, etc. How can one possibly be expected to manage another person or a group of people? Add to this that today’s employees are expected to (at least in theory) actually, make great contributions to their organizations and make their supervisors look good. The more I read, the more I realized how far we still have to go with distinguishing these two key competencies.

Leadership and management are both necessary, but they are different.

https://culcnitisunb.wordpress.com/2014/03/21/management-leadership/

Leadership and management are both necessary competencies that add institutional value. Neither is superior or inferior to the other; they are just different. We manage things such as programs, budgets, contracts, projects and processes, but we should be leading people. The idea of ‘managing’ people just sounds demeaning in the 21st century. Many of us wear both hats, but we need to understand the difference so that we appropriately flex within and between the two roles.

Has your boss or supervisor ever said any of this to you – I am your manager; I am managing you, or I manage ten people? What did it make you think? How did this make you feel?

In business school and graduate school, I learned that management is the act or skill of directing, controlling, handling, deciding, overseeing, etc. Not even one of these words fits in with anything I want another person doing to me or for me. How about you? I also learned that leadership is about influencing, developing, coaching, guiding, mentoring or supervising people. So we need to be leading people and managing all that other stuff. The distinction is real and it matters.

If the ‘experts’ in the field keep getting this wrong how can we expect mid-level managers and executives to get this right? The perpetual lack of understanding with these concepts is holding people back in their careers, and it is negatively impacting organizational success.

There are people who are great leaders but horrible managers, and there are people who are great managers and horrible leaders. How can this be? Because these two competencies require different skillsets. Too often hiring managers want to hire someone to lead but they focus the entire job analysis and interview on management and vice versa.

If you want to hire a manager, define the competencies for that role based on what management is all about. If you want to hire a leader, define the competencies for that role based on what leadership is all about. If you want to hire someone who will be competent in both, be sure to outline what that looks like then create an appropriate position description and ask the right questions during the interview.

Management is typically reflected via one’s title, but leadership isn’t.

One can hold the title of manager and never actually have staff or employees under his direction because he is (shall I say it again) ‘managing’ a program, a budget, a project or an enterprise that he actually has control over and needs to direct, handle and oversee effectively.

Management happens with one or more decision makers for a particular unit/department/division/organization where there exists a ‘thing’ to be managed, controlled, handled, directed or overseen. The unit/department/division/organization has a budget, program, service, contract or process (a thing) to be managed. However, the people within the respective section need to be (and I assert they prefer to be) led.

To be a leader one needs others whom he can influence or impact in some way (some people call these followers). It is not a requirement that these people be under his direct span of control in the normal supervisory lines, but they must be within his circle of influence. Leaders can – and do – lead down, across and up. We lead (influence) subordinates, colleagues, team members and even our superiors. This is why we now understand that leadership can and does happen at every level within an organization.

Leadership is about helping ordinary people get extraordinary results. It is about developing critical thinking, problem-solving and process improvement skills in others and giving them the opportunity to apply these skills and have input on decisions. Leaders are charged to ask the questions that compel others (at every level) to consider choices, actually, think and then provide recommendations to others.

Leadership is not about titles. It is not about seniority. It is not about status, and it is not about management. Leadership is about power and the ability to know when and how to use it to influence the people around you to do and become more! Transformational leadership is about using your actions to elevate others and put them on their path to greatness.

You can be a leader and never actually formally supervise employees, and you can be a manager and never actually have formal authority over a staff or team. It is important to note, however, that one's position title is not a reflection of whether he is capable of doing either (leading or managing) very well.

The wrap up: Manage things and lead people.

Manage things, even manage yourself, but when it comes to other people, we prefer words like lead, supervise, coach, guide, mentor, etc. It keeps the perspective away from trying to handle, oversee, direct or worse - control - other individuals. That would not be appropriate (except in extreme circumstances - safety, etc.).

I educate students, facilitate workshops for professionals at all levels and provide consulting and executive coaching, and one thing I have been pushing against for 20 years is this notion that we would ever actually be able to effectively ‘manage’ anyone. Individual people have their own minds, and they get to make their own choices. We can try to influence and shape those choices and behaviours through leadership, but it is not appropriate to attempt to direct and control them – this is what management is supposed to be doing with “things.”

The whole notion of an ever-increasing knowledge workforce where people are being hired and paid to think strategically, align themselves with organizational missions and then deliver meaningful outcomes for internal and external stakeholders are predicated on the idea (and hopefully practice) of really having leaders develop other leaders and pull from the talent all around them (above, across and beneath their own positions of authority).

Remember when you attempt to ‘manage’ other people, you are in effect limiting or removing their choices – their power. And when you do this, you end up losing everything (all the experience, education, training and brilliance that you hired them for in the first place). Manage the things you need to manage, but lead the people you are supposed to lead.

Terina Allen is a strategist, consultant, international speaker and the CEO of ARVis Institute, a management consulting and executive/leadership development firm.

The Leader Vs. The Follower in Us

Image Credit: https://www.canstockphoto.com/leader-vs-follower-person-split-48726568.html

I believe the cost of awareness is responsibility.

To be aware is one thing, for the awareness to have any considerable impact in our lives it’s another thing. Most people are aware of what they ought to do, but few do it. If only up to about 3 percent of any society or population would practice what they know, there would be immense greatness. Unfortunately, all these we know is not having any impact on our lives because we are not paying the cost; taking responsibility. Living what we profess; walking the talk.

It’s very much easy to let the whole world know how much we know, but how ready are we to practice that which we know. It doesn’t really matter how much you know if all that is not helping in any way.

One of my greatest wonder working with people is how few people really take responsibility for what they know. I personally know how much hard it is to pay the price and act on what you know. I like the analogy of the leader and the follower in us. Each of us has the two. Some may call it the good and the bad, the saint, and the evil that is in continuous battle in us. The good or the leader in us knows that which we ought to do. The leader in us have plans on how we can do that which we ought to do. But the follower in us has its own ideas, plans. The leader in us knows how to mend the key relationships in us, but the follower in us has other ideas about this. Some of us continuously feed the follower, who slowly overpowers the leader in us. Or we find ourselves in continuous battle as we have not decided on who we are going to give full authority in our lives. We move back and forth.

Image Credit: http://www.dreamstime.com/royalty-free-stock-images-leader-vs-follower-concept-word-compass-needle-conceptual-d-render-image-depth-field-blur-effect-image34593829

One of my greatest battles which I’m still in is mending the relationships with my family members; step-father, and siblings. The leader in me knows I need to mend these relationships. My wife has been a good one on this. Continuously challenging me to act on things that will make my relationships with my sibling better than it is now. Unfortunately, due to my own fear of conflict, fear of confrontation, feeling of inadequacy, wishing that things would magically address themselves, not having what to sometimes say, things have remained as they are. This is in turn, affecting me in ways I don't like. As I write this article, it’s clear in my head that unless I take responsibility and do what I know I need to do, this important relationship will not change if not get worse. I may choose to pray over it, but unless I act by the grace of God, which he makes abundant, all the prayers I make will just be that; prayers.

In AYLF, we continue to urge everyone we interact with is to take responsibility and do something about their lives. Translate what they know into action. One of our senior friends like using the acronym NATO; No Action Talk Only. He says we need to stop NATO. Do something about our situations and those around us. We spend a lot of time in small group conversations in AYLF, but without individual and group responsibility to act on what we know, it’s all a waste of time. Most people misunderstand us thinking we are just Talk Only. In those talks, our goal is to flesh out what each of us is dealing with and hopefully nail down what we each need to act on and then go and act on them. This is not about programs; as much as we have a few programs on that. It’s about having responsible young people willing to lead their lives and those around them. Those who are committed to empowering the leader in them; not the follower in them. Those willing to acknowledge their struggles and do something about them as they provide leadership to those around them. It’s in doing something that we bear fruits.

Image Credit: https://www.kompasiana.com/assyafii/nato-no-action-talk-only_550bc33b8133115b22b1e252

Which area of your life do you need to empower the leader in you? Where do you need to pay the cost of responsibility? The good book, in many cases, calls upon us to translate what we know into fruits.

If this resonates with you, take responsibility for what you already know. Look for a small community of friends who you can learn to do this together with. Being accountable to a few and practicing with a few. It's about building a community of friends to share each other's journey of empowering the leader in you.  You have to be deeply committed to each other and desire to see each other grow in this journey. You have to create a support, encouragement, and accountability platform for each other. The community has to be as small as possible so that there is active engagement by all involved.

Find a community around you and see if these conversations make sense to you.

Image Credits: http://www.businessmalawi.com

By Gabriel Achayo