Flexibility and Happiness

I believe in life; flexibility is key to achieving happiness.

I grew up with a rigid mentality with a desire to always have things go my way. Any thought that something would not go my way scared me and I avoided such things. Life has taught me countless times that being flexible makes you enjoy every moment as it comes. This, however, means that you have to be rooted in some principles to guide you in this flexibility. Every minute you choose to be flexible, it should be in line with your values and principles. How you spend your time, what relationships to nurture, how you spend your money, what work you do, etc should be based on what really defines who you are, and in line with your priorities.

Life has turns that we never clearly see where they are and when they will hit us. Every morning waking up to face the day is like waking up to face uncertainty and indeed the risks that, that day will bring your way. A number of mornings I have woken up with a clear plan for my day but evening reaches and I have either spent the whole of it in the hospital, or in meetings that I have chosen to be part of. What matters most at the end of the day in everything I did or didn't do that day? Do I go home with the disappointment written on my face because I didn't have my day go as I had planned? I need to learn how to derive happiness on those little tiny moments that brought meaning to my life.

For the past one year, I mostly made one prayer; Lord I know you are going to do great things today. Whatever you are blessing may I be part of it. Lead me to whoever you want me to add value to today. Show me who you want me to love today. May today be the best day of life to your glory and because of you. I want to love you today a little bit more Lord. Amen

This prayer has been to me a way of surrender to what God has planned for me. This is, however, easier said than done. I still find myself very rigid and always wanting to insist on my way. 

As I learn to always live life expecting a miracle and knowing that He who knows it all has great plans for my life and future, I found much joy and meaning. These moments of joy and meaning constitute happiness in life. Instead of wanting to tick some to do lists due to my rigidity, I’d rather in wisdom surrender to the one who knew all my days before I was formed in my mother’s womb. Based on the principles and values that I have learned from what He has made me interact with, I make effort to daily align my priorities with these principles. The principles of Love, Unity, the kingdom of God, God before self, God before others, purpose, bearing fruit, word of God etc form my guide to living in flexibility.

As a follower of Jesus, how do I learn more how to live by these principles, align my values to these principles and live my life always expecting a miracle as I work my to-do list and at the end of the day, celebrate these moments of joy that bring happiness in life.

Walking around looking for a happy life is like chasing after the wind, but living in flexibility guided by values that are aligned to the principles make life worth living and in it lies the greatest happiness. I have made a commitment to every day write down three things that brought me joy or made me tick in the course of the day. I invite you to try it. Sometimes they are more than three other times they are way less. But a day doesn't pass without me identify a moment of joy. This to me is happiness.

If this resonates with you, go ahead to evaluate your flexibility in life. Start now… Then look for a small community of friends who you can do this together with… Being accountable to a few and practicing with a few. It’s about building a community of friends to share each other’s journey of life with, as you find happiness.  You have to be deeply committed to each other and desire to see each other grow in this journey. You have to create a support, encouragement and accountability platform for each other. The community has to be a small as possible so that there is active engagement by all involved.

Find a community around you and see if these conversations make sense to you…

 By Gabriel Odhiambo Achayo