I believe life should be lived with a
strict Flexible plan.
It's good to plan every minute of your
life. Know what next and why, and follow through with it. It's is said that
failing to plan is planning to fail. In a happy world, this is 100% correct. Unfortunately,
in real life, where we have to deal with people, and we have family and
children involved, you need an attitude of flexibility. Your family will always
need you sometime when you are right in the middle of your plan. If you value
family as I do, when family comes calling, you can't delegate this. You can
delegate other areas of your life but not when it comes to your most important
part of your life; family.
Planning Flexibly or rather planning with
an attitude of flexibility implies that everyone, including yourself, is fully
aware of what you are trying to achieve, but also that the path is not curved on
stone. Especially if it comes to dealing with third parties. You need to know
your non-negotiables and know your negotiables. The non-negotiables should be
what is inside of you, that which you have influence over. It could be your
faith, your belief, your absolute truth about life, your absolute “WHY” in life. It should be about your
core value systems. As much as your value system could be influenced over time
by what you experience, but the core value system should be your guardrail.
That which you hold on to dearly and is your filter to every negotiable you
come across.
Your negotiables are more about the “HOW.” The structures, the resources,
the what, the people you meet in this life, money, things that are more out of
your control. More of your circle of concern. You need to know that which concerns
you and that which you can influence. Our frustration comes when we can’t
separate the two. The negotiables and the non-negotiables. So many times, we make negotiables,
non-negotiables, and vice versa.
Don't spend time chasing a right answer or
a right path, but instead spend time defining how you are going to approach
whatever path you choose. What values most define you. What questions do you
want to pursue? What is seems right now, might change tomorrow. If you have
been engaged in anything in life, I believe you appreciate this fact. I call
this relative truth. It makes sense to you now, but when things change, it will
not hold as true. It could be the right path now, but with exposure and more
information coming your way, you may look at it differently and be quick to
embrace another path that will hold for as long as you operate in the same
paradigm/situation. Remember, this is your negotiable. You approach is what
will be your non-negotiable. This has to be very clear to you because it's
about your core value system; it's about what your life is all about.
I love this quote by Tim McGraw; We should all reassess what we think and
believe constantly - in politics, in life, and in our thinking. Otherwise, we
get too rigid.
The more you get exposed, the more you are
able to realize that somethings will not last and as such, they form part of
your life experience. You develop a flexible attitude to life. The danger
sometimes might be if you lose out on yourself. Continuously reassessing your
absolutes and relative truths, negotiables, and non-negotiables, your level of
flexibility is very key. Becoming too rigid in this life is very expensive and
frustrating.
So as you plan your life goals, desires,
and objectives, take into account that things will always not work the way you
want them to, but don't lose your focus. Adopt a flexible attitude and enjoy
the experience as you learn from it.
If this resonates with
you, go ahead to evaluate your non-negotiables and negotiables, your absolute
and relative truth. Look for a small community of friends who you can do this together
with. Being accountable to a few and
practising with a few. It’s about building a community of friends to share each
other’s journey of life with, as you plan flexibly. You have to be deeply committed to each other
and desire to see each other grow in this journey. You have to create a
support, encouragement, and accountability platform for each other. The
community has to be as small as possible so that there is active engagement by
all involved.
Find a community around you
and see if these conversations make sense to you.
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